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Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Dolly Parton was on American Idol last night. I'm getting my haircut today.

She's the girl next door...if you happen to live next door to an amusement park!  And I didn't come up with that, she did!

There's only one Dolly, which is probably a good thing because I don't think the world can handle more than force of nature like this.


What amazes me about Dolly is her authenticity.  Even with the fake nails and hairpieces and... well everything, she's still so down to earth.  She'd be the first one to tell you that it takes a lot of work to look as outrageous as she does.  I believe she's even compared herself to a show dog!

She's so over the top, she's for real.  But it's just wrong when anybody else tries this.  Only Dolly Parton can look like THIS and not look stupid.  Because she is Dolly Parton.  

And you, my friend, are not Dolly Parton.  Nope, you are not. No big yellow hair and sparkly gingham shirt for you, uh uh!  Sorry!

But I'll tell ya, I suddenly very much want a yellow pickup truck and a giant pink dress. Why is it illegal in Ontario to ride around in the back of a pickup truck?  Why?  It can't be because it'll wreck your magnificent up-do.  Dolly would find a way around it.  I love the title of her newest record.  BACKWOODS BARBIE.  That is awesome.   That is so Hick Chic.  She is my hero.

But let's not forget the whole reason why she is a superstar.  It's her talent.  She has written, like, a gazillion songs.  At least.  Seriously, twenty-five number 1 hits.  Her songs have been covered by everyone from Whitney Houston to the White Stripes.  You know her voice the instant you hear it.  

And I, my friends, am not Dolly Parton.  Not in any way shape or form!


I've got a noon appointment for a cut and colour.  I'm trying a new place.  The salon has a name I can never remember and nobody flinched when I told them I'm a year overdue for a little trim.  When I said I want some pink highlights, she nodded her head and told me they could do that.  Yessss!  Although I'm feeling kind of burned because a girl named Avril totally jacked my pink hair thing.  Okay, she doesn't know me from a hole in the ground, but I'm just saying, I was totally doing pink hair two years ago.  Imagine running into her at a party.  It would be awkward.  I'm just saying.  

And then I'm going to do laundry and pack.  Pictures to follow.  Of the hair do, not of the suitcase.  

And IIIII eeeIIIIIIIIII

will always 

love youuuuuuuu.....

27 comments:

Real Live Lesbian said...

I love me some Dolly! And...which one of the last two pics is you? I can't tell. ;)

Heidi the Hick said...

hahaha!

Good one!

Heidi the Hick said...

Okay, I think my future author photo should either be sprawled on the grass like Dolly (since we look so much alike, haha!) or in the back of a pickup bed full of straw while wearing an elaborate ballgown.

Marni said...

I saw her biography on the Biography channel and fell even MORE in love with her. She is a brilliant, strong, talented, amazing woman... and her songs... oh my gosh... love them!!!

Can't wait to see the pics of your hair... and are you getting a new dress or wearing the awesome one from last year?!

Heidi the Hick said...

Dolly's such a character that I think a lot of people forget temporarily what a musician she is!

and yup, I"m wearing the same dress from last year! I love it. I'm wearing it to the black tie dinner on Saturday night, and on Sunday (red carpet + concert) I'm wearing my Johnny hoodie!

All Peach Berserk!

I can't believe it- I've done this routine before but it still freaks me out.

GOTTA GO! Quick dog walk and then haircut!!!!!

Anita said...

Dolly has always been one of my favorite people...
When I had my hair done, the girl (who screwed it up) suggested some blue streaks... says that's the popular color right now... I'm not a blue kinda gal - but pink was taken, so I politely turned her down! I'll stick with my Bride-of-Frankenstein grey stripes at the temples!! lol... Can't wait to see how your hair turns out! :)

coffeypot said...

My Betty had a since of humor a lot like Dolly - the self-depreciating thing. She is so funny and talented.

But look at you. How much more sexy can you get with our hair spread out and wearing a John Deer t-shirt. OH THE FANTICIES! Maybe wearing a flannel shirt… OH SHIT!!!!

Olly said...

Sounds like you are feeling much better:)

dilling said...

i love dolly but i am so worried about how terribly thin she was the last time i saw her...and even in those photos.
she is an amazing songwriter..and i love her voice as well.
she once said, since she is this "character" whenever she is in public, that she can actually just get in the rv with her husband and go camping like everyone else since nobody knows who she is without all the wigs and makeup and getups...how cool would it be to run into her at a KOA campground?
have fun today....don't leave us hanging for photos.

Heidi the Hick said...

Anita, I think the grey streaks are cool too! (You could always dye those pink, hee hee!)

Coffeypot, yes, the John Deere T and flannel shirt is definitely sexy. On anybody!

Olly, thank you, yup, I'm feeling a little bit better every day. (what a relief!)

Dilling I am always concerned when somebody gets too thin. She is absolutely tiny in the first place. She just canceled her tour because her back is sore. Well. You can imagine. Okay well I can't personally, not being top heavy like she is. I gotta tell you, it would be amazing to get the campground site beside her!

Heidi the Hick said...

OH by the way-

Operation Haircut is a success!

It's not bright pink, it's more of a blush pink. But I like it. It's sneaky.

If we'd gone with bright colour it would have been hard on my hair and I figure it's been through enough.

Pictures later, once I get a kid to take one for me!

Anissa said...

Can't wait to see pics of the new do!

Lynn Sinclair said...

She is unique. But so are you. Have fun at the Junos (and best of luck!!!)

katy said...

Glad you suvived the uni brow treatment!
those kids taken the photo yet? and just checking you have EATEN

Heidi the Hick said...

I have eaten two pieces of toast, a few crackers, two chocolates at the salon (salon! oo fancy) and an apple.

Not much, but better than nothing.

Picture comin' up...

Heidi said...

love that last photo of you! Great pic!

There is a lady in my town with bright pink hair. Whenever I see her, I think of you! It's such a happy color.... hope your happiness follows!

Tod said...

Dolly is great. Good luck with the whole Juno thing!

Biddie said...

LOVE the sprawling grass photo!
I think that Dolly is incredibly talented, but after all of that plastic surgery, she wigs me out..no pun intended :)

Heidi the Hick said...

snort!

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